In a world where societal conventions and expectations frequently clash with personal ideas and values, one woman’s online request for aid generated a passionate debate. This story dives into the difficulties of modern festivities and the cultural constraints they impose. Join us as we peel the layers of this contentious issue.
She explained the circumstances.
My husband and I have one boy together, and I am currently pregnant with our second child. My husband and I have already reserved the space for the gender reveal; however, we will forfeit the photographer’s deposit as well as the money we spent on decorations.
However, he is more concerned about the reputational impact because he grew up wealthy, has a high-paying job, and owns an interest in a family firm.
However, I can see that, despite the fact that we already have a boy whom he adores (they can do no wrong in each other’s eyes, and my son has always had every toy, fun activity, and best clothes supplied by his father), he urgently wants our second child (who we expect to be our last) to be male.
I went into arranging this reveal thinking that gender disappointment is acceptable, but I’ve realized that there’s hoping for a son and then fixating on NOT having a daughter even more than wanting another son, and my spouse falls into the latter group.
We didn’t do a gender reveal for our firstborn because my husband kept putting off whether or not he wanted to hear it from the doctor and when. We ended up learning (with him ecstatic) about having a son less than a month before giving birth.
It’s not all his fault: he grew up with an older dad who was always controlling towards his mother. Their town at the time was essentially a company town, and his dad threatened her family’s jobs.
Now his demons are back. We reached a point where he agreed to me going alone to find out the baby’s gender (without informing him), and I discovered we were having a girl. I guess I didn’t have the best poker face after seeing his unfavorable reaction when I arrived home.
He is arguing he doesn’t know the baby’s gender because I did not explicitly tell him, but 100 percent he does know. I’d be fine with a reveal where the guests are the ones being surprised, but it’s in a week and with each day my husband grows more withdrawn, and he’s not the type who can fake happiness and often tries to leave and pull me away with him when he’s really upset.
I decided to pull the plug. Again, he’s not mad about the money, yet he’s angry that we’re doing this to our family and friends and what this may say about him. I put my foot down.
